Learning to spy

I wouldn’t normally be seen dead thumbing through an old Doctor Who book in the middle of a busy market, but there I am, feigning interest in its yellowed pages and trying not to look shifty. I’m the “eyeball”, you see, and I’ve got the hostile target in my sights.

We’ve been tracking him for hours and intelligence suggests he’s part of a small extremist cell that have planted a dirty bomb in town. Worryingly, it’s up to me and my fellow spies to get the information that will help defuse it.

We’re against the clock, I’m starting to sweat and the earpiece linked to my covert radio is starting to make me feel deaf in one ear. And, just as the target slips beyond my view into a sea of dawdling shoppers, a huge man pulls me back by my shoulder.

“You got time to do a survey, bro?” he booms in my good ear, waving a leaflet in my face. Think fast, I'm telling myself. What’s my cover story? I’m losing the target and I can’t possibly radio for backup without giving myself away. So I do what every good spy would do. I panic.

“Sorry mate, I can’t," I find myself saying. And then, without a second thought, I blurt it out, "I’m undercover."

I’m an idiot. It’s game over. Curtains, if I was really working for MI5. The target’s long gone, foghorn survey man has told everyone there's a spy in the market and a crowd of pensioners with stripy shopping bags are now circling me suspiciously to see if they can spot my radio. Luckily though, blowing my cover in such a stupid way isn’t going to get me shot today.

Fantasy world

The target, you see, is former special branch detective Andrew Greenslade, who has just started running these experience days to help make the fantasy world of spies a reality for paying customers. With 23 years’ experience in the police – and some rather scary stories to tell – he’s certainly the right man for the job.

“I’m a bit of a nutcase,” he says, “I’ve always been one – it’s what keeps you alive and makes you survive in the police service”.

Since leaving the force four years ago, Greenslade has been working with WFO Group (which he now owns and operates through Greenslade Business Consultants) to develop various training courses and themed events for the corporate world. The new company is also responsible for training local authority wardens and police community support officers, and is the biggest single provider of police promotions exam training in the country, with 190 consultant trainers around the UK.

"Spooks Vs 24"

The latest course, based around TV shows like Spooks and 24, might make use of fun, high-tech gadgets and some clever playacting, but it's also backed up by serious expert surveillance knowledge. Once participants arrive at the enormous house that plays host to the simulation in rural Nottinghamshire they are given a thorough briefing on the task ahead. Greenslade guides them through the surveillance techniques they will need to use throughout the course, which includes ‘plotting up’ buildings, tracking subjects discreetly and using covert radios.

Wannabe spies also learn how best to use their resources and, crucially, the importance of working together to stop the bad guys.

“In various worlds we can train this as a straight team-build, as an absolutely deadly serious surveillance course or as a merger of the two,” Greenslade tells us.

“The base format will be the same but I would say to our clients, ‘this is training for reality’. We’re training different agencies to work under different levels of pressure – depending on what their needs are.”

Real life use

The idea stems from a real life, 10-week-long police training course, which teaches officers how to become ‘surveillants’ both on foot and on the roads. Inspector Chris Shepherdson, a serving police officer who took part in the course, says he was particularly impressed with its potential to be tailored to the needs of individual customers.

“I could see the surveillance being of great benefit to serving officers wishing to specialise in this area with a more intense training programme.

“It also proves an excellent tool as a team building exercise over one or two days, particularly if you are looking to improve effective communication skills throughout your team. I have already arranged further talks with Andrew to discuss training needs.”

Helicopters

With the right budget, corporate clients can expect numerous surprises thrown into the day’s events, including high-power cars, quad bikes and even helicopters. The ‘bomb’ that plays a crucial part in the story can even be rigged up to pyrotechnics outside for a memorable finale.

“We’ve come a long way from rafting and paintballing,” said Greenslade. “As much fun as that is: once you’ve done it, you’ve done it, whereas this we can mould, we can change, we can actually go in and training assess the clients based on what their needs are. It’s eminently pitch-able.”

A few warnings, though. You’ll get tired, you’ll probably be given the run-around and you’ll certainly find yourself attracting strange looks as you walk around shops, talking into your hidden microphone. But, if you’re as good at the spy game as some on my course, you might even scare off real shoplifters. Who can argue with that?

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